Looking back now, my path to “A Course in Miracles” probably all started in 1969 when I accepted Jesus my personal Lord and Savior, underneath the influence of the Campus Crusade for Christ. However, after joining a Christian brotherhood of aspiring monks, where I was daily quizzed on how many Bible verses I’d memorized and could recite verbatim, I was totally confused because of it all. Their version of reality just didn’t sit well with me. I felt such as a parrot of Bible verses, that I didn’t even begin to understand, or town crier that nobody wished to hear. Jesus would show me more, much more.
As divine synchronicity could have it, I ingested a hallucinogen that resulted in a near death experience the afternoon after Christmas, 1970. When I was in the black void, with only the consciousness that “I Am”, George Harrison’s song My Sweet Lord began playing. That was my voice singing to God, not George’s! Soon a brilliant white light began appearing out of the darkness, as my soul sang “I genuinely wish to see you Lord “.Then somebody started initially to emerge out of the light. This Holy One oscillated between masculine and feminine. As I’d been praying to Jesus, I thought it could be him, but with out a beard. I began crying from the depths of my soul, while the Holy One communicated telepathically into my heart. I knew this Being to be only pure love. Then it had been over. I was shot back in my body, hearing what to a fresh song telling me “this has been quite a while coming, it’s going to be quite a while gone.” How true that’s been.
Per year later, I saw the cover of Autobiography of a Yogi. It had been Paramahansa Yogananda who’d come to me! Next came meeting Baba Ram Dass, who confirmed that I wasn’t crazy and stated that Yogananda had appeared to many young spiritual seekers on drugs. He also autographed my copy of Be Here Now. My next decade was spent becoming an aspiring yogi and practicing Yogananda’s Self-Realization Fellowship lessons and exercises, chanting, meditating and receiving initiation into Kriya yoga. Yogananda’s path and linage of gurus brought the essential clarity for me to understand Jesus and Christianity better. Yogananda also showed me the essential truth behind the oneness of religions. And he brought me to Babaji, the Mahavatar who sent him to America in the 1920s. From the time I heard the name Babaji, I knew I knew Him. He and Jesus interact, behind the scenes, in the cosmic scheme of things. And Babaji was to be the next step in my own ongoing spiritual evolution. However, I didn’t know now that He had supposedly manifested a body again and was residing in the tiny village of Haidakhan, in northern India. That could come later, combined with the mystery and myth of the current manifestation.
After hearing Bhagavan Das sing, I bought a dotara and began chanting mantras to God daily. This simple, ancient two- stringed instrument is easy to play and lets one follow the drone sound into silence. At this time, I purchased my very own place in the woods and met a person who’d lived with Babaji. He conducted a Vedic fire ceremony that Babaji had taught him to initiate my new abode. I questioned and grilled him repeatedly, asking if this new Babaji was the exact same entity Yogananda wrote about. Yes, one and the exact same but peoples egos still question His true identity a course in miracles online retreats Babaji’s new Kriya yoga was the road of truth, simplicity and love while performing karma yoga- work – and keeping one’s mind on God, through repetition of the ancient mantra Om Namaha Shivaya. Babaji stated that mantra alone was stronger than a lot of atomic bombs and His 1-800 number. I began now seriously doing japa, or the repetition of the mantra on 108 rudraksha beads, to have this vibration into my sub consciousness. I also learned many approaches to chant it on my dotara. With all this going on, I bought “A Course in Miracles” and began the daily lessons immediately. I tried to make sense of the Text but got nowhere; each sentence bogged me down and needed to be re-read over way too many times to assimilate. I was just too young, I told myself. I was thirty-three. I’d deal with this particular Text later, someday, maybe.
Then following a year of being married, our home burns down- a genuine karmic fire ceremony. In the ashes, untouched by the fire, was a picture of Babaji and His cymbals from Haidakhan. Discuss miracles! Next, was the unexpected news that we have a baby coming, after losing everything? My marriage started initially to dissolve quickly after I fell twenty feet off a roof, breaking my body in twelve places. Surviving death, I was put back in college for 2 yrs to be retrained, while my ex-wife and son left for the Southwest. This really is when each of my abandonment issues resulted in extreme drinking alone. After graduation, I left for India to see Babaji’s ashram, as He had already left His physical body again, and to pray for assistance with my entire life in the absolute most spiritual country on earth. I attended the 1995 Kumbha Mela festival with ten million others and lo and behold, who should appear? It had been Babaji, asking me if I was having fun. Yes, but I couldn’t speak to answer Him! Then He disappeared back in the crowd, leaving me blown away. Returning state side, I ended up following my ex- wife and son to the Southwest, where my next thing was peyote meetings with the Native Americans for several years to come. Everything I’d read and studied in the Course was evident on the medicine inside that tipi. God Is. I learned more in one night than I’d in years of studying metaphysical books. But I didn’t practice all I’d learned and I let my depressed ego, alcohol and abandonment issues take me closer to death’s very door. However, as fate, karma and prayers could have it, I ended up in prison for 2.5 years on an aggravated DUI, as opposed to dead, where I stumbled upon the Courses’Manual for Teachers within our library. Soon, I’d the entire book submitted absolve to prisoners and was reintroduced to Jesus again, with all the time I wanted to study every word of that lengthy text. After two decades, I must certanly be old enough to have it now! In time and with the help of the Course, I was finally in a position to forgive myself for the bizarre life my ego had constructed. I did the daily lessons again, wanting to see the facial skin of Christ within each inmate. That was not an easy one. But I left prison a changed, free sober man, far better for the knowledge and with an initial draft book about everything under my belt. Today, I’ve eight years of sobriety under my belt and my book Still Singing, Somehow won the fall Pinnacle Book Achievement Award. This is a very condensed version of my story- an odyssey of 1 soul’s karma.